One Last Time

As it seems, I am unconsciously a fan of deadlines.

It’s ironic, I know. I procrastinate a lot, rant about not having enough time to do everything all the time, barely have time to relax, and complains endlessly about stress as if it’s always the first time. If anything, I should be the last person saying something positive about due dates.

But when I said that I kind of like deadlines, I was actually thinking about that feeling that something will stop happening. It feels good to know that certain things like stress, anxiety, and panic, will cease to exist after some time – that they only have a limited period and that I will get a break from them, even though short. It’s good to realise that the world does not stop for me, and that everyone has a lot going on that they would not really stop what they’re doing just to look down on me.

Of course, good things also have deadlines. But at least you’ll know that they are just around the corner, waiting for the cycle to complete.


Which got me thinking on the side.. why do we always hope that the last times will last?

Last hug.

Last message.

Last smile.

Last bit of hope that someone’s coming back.

It’s quite ironic, you know? Hoping that the last thing will last forever. Or is it our way of reminding ourselves that the last times will always be a part of who we are? That the last times will stick around for a much longer period, even though they’re already due.

This is the last time that I am going to think about.. you.


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